For the next 7 days temps between 96-99 degrees. We will hit 100 soon. There is no relief in sight. Texas will be eating any and all tropical depressions/storms entering the gulf.

Words you will hear for the next few months:

  • Drier than average
  • High pressure system
  • No relief in sight
  • Hazy
  • Fires in Mexico
  • Fires in California
  • Dust from Africa (yes really)

Yes. Today is the official first day of summer. We will begin our slow cooked descent into heat triggered madness. I will officially stop going to Fry’s until October (they do this energy saving thing where they keep the AC at like 80), I will punch any and all people in the throat who dare to suggest dining outside. No I don’t care that it’s now dark. It’s still 85 fucking degrees and the heat rising from the sun baked pavement DOES NOT HELP. No, it does not matter that it’s a “dry heat”. No it does not matter that it’s NOT a dry heat and that it’s worse in Houston/Louisiana. Heat is heat, motherfucker.

So. Don’t die. Stay cool. Help people (usually the elderly) who don’t have AC by donating fans/money to get fans: http://www.familyeldercare.org/