• I'm at Walgreens (12550 Metric Blvd, W Parmer Ln, Austin) http://t.co/8juXjp2e #
  • I'm at Speedy Stop (10800 Research Blvd., W Braker Ln., Austin) http://t.co/LvFFMzlT #
  • Will someone PLEASE feed Angelina Jolie?! #oscars #
  • Okay, I know I'm an hour behind, but what the fuck is Chris Rock doing with his hair??? #oscars #onehourbehind #
  • Cool! Sheila E playing at the oscars!!!! #oscars #80sflashback #
  • And yeah, only 36 minutes behind. #oscars #
  • Fun fact: Texas still recognizes handwritten wills that does not need witnesses. #tmyk #
  • Oh you like my style, say you like my crew? Say you wanna' be under my chest, this turtle neck is like one of my best #
  • I am voluntarily watching NASCAR. #
  • Hey there Fox 7, using the weather alert system to tell me Big Bang Theory isn't coming on is not cool. At least hide the map. Sheesh. #
  • Soooo, the Daytona 500 has points? You know what, I don't think I care anymore. Cars go vroom! #
  • I have watched over an hour and a half of NASCAR. Voluntarily. I don't even know who I am anymore. #
  • How do you run out of gas in a NASCAR race??? Isn't this why you have a pit crew and radios and gauges and shit? #nascar #
  • Whoa! Dude ran into the track drying truck. Full of jet fuel. Which is now on fire. Is NASCAR always like this?? (Drivers are fine) #
  • So what kind of damage does 200 gallons of flaming jet fuel do to a road surface? Guess we're about to find out. #nascar #amireallywatching? #
  • I'm at Sea Dragon (8776 Research Blvd B, Austin) http://t.co/5fcubYg1 #
  • From the forums: "Thumb drives: Like the health center condom jar, but made for nerds. " #
  • Why do you have a link on your website labelled "Menu with prices" and when I download the damn thing…THERE ARE NO PRICES??? #
  • Holy Crap Davy Jones is dead??? Now who will Marcia get to play at the school dance??? #
  • Stephen Hawking goes to strip clubs. Surprise, surprise. He's male, people. Why is this news? #
  • How can you not click a link that says "Jimmy Olson, Robot Fucker"? I mean, really! http://t.co/1YciXW1b (SFW) #
  • NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! RT @steelers: Hines Ward to be released. Full Story: http://t.co/3KVMwTKB #
  • I'm at Fry's Electronics (12707 N. Mopac Expy., Parmer Ln., Austin) http://t.co/yv4xkP0A #
  • I'm at Jack in the Box (9825 Burnet Rd, at Rutland Dr., Austin) http://t.co/jetwrKPV #
  • I…I must have one! RT @thinkgeek: It's still early enough for juice, right? http://t.co/zW9LW37F #
  • I'm at Masala Wok (Austin) http://t.co/lcgnLkxJ #
  • Everyone needs a goodnight kiss. http://t.co/sXzbtOxH #
  • Real life Muffliato spell! RT @WootLive: We have to get our hands on this. http://t.co/JTG1kJyU #
  • Jameson 750ml $25.99 or 2 for $39.99! (@ Twin Liquors) http://t.co/Hj3Y0SWc #
  • Burger tour! (@ Culver's) http://t.co/VBEW9zAt #
  • What the crap? http://t.co/Sbne6PYM #
  • HOW??? http://t.co/EYwRMsLs #
  • I challenge @Drafthouse & @OpenRoadFilms to scare me with SILENT HOUSE! http://t.co/ZTC1Ifyc #
  • Tornado in Indiana just wiped a town off the map. http://t.co/RM7edp9M #
  • I'm at Alamo Drafthouse Cinema for Dr. Seuss' The Lorax 3D (13729 Research Blvd, at Hymeadow Dr, Austin) w/ 7 others http://t.co/lRtJv7jl #
  • I'm at Original Pancake House (1700 W Parmer Ln, Metric Blvd, Austin) w/ 2 others http://t.co/QMfWbj7n #
  • I'm at H-E-B (500 Canyon Ridge Dr W, at Interstate Hwy 35, Austin) http://t.co/0jIwbD6m #

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